From Shutong

Hello Airing. I hope you will forgive this unsolicited letter!

I am writing mainly to ask you about planning a life.

First, a brief introduction: I am graduating this year, 〔combination of universities, qualifications and subject withheld〕. I have signed an offer for a backend development role at 〔company withheld〕, 〔specific starting date withheld〕.

Here is how I came across you. During 〔specific stage of study withheld〕, I was interning with 〔internship team withheld〕. The workload was not too heavy, and I would browse the internal knowledge platform in my spare time. Once I found you, I immediately followed you on every platform.

Airing, my first question is how to live with composure. Today I saw an idea that there are only two kinds of life: one in which you first work out what kind of person you want to become, then earn money; and another in which earning money is all you think about. These lead to different outcomes: being the master of money, or being carried along by it. I desperately want to be the first kind of person, but know that the second, a life accepted under pressure, is much more common.

I came from 〔region where I grew up withheld〕. Let me offer a superficial description of “people like me”: most are sensitive, self-conscious, and afraid to step onto the stage. We admire other people's brilliance while hesitating over whether to perform ourselves. By the time the stage lights go out, our palms are drenched in sweat, yet we have never risen from our seats. Such people are lonely too. From primary school to secondary school to university, one wave of people after another arrives and leaves. We do not dare—or, more often, do not have the energy—to sustain another friendship. Simply moving forward has already taken too much.

I have kept running, breathless on every leg of the journey, trying hard to keep up a respectable appearance. But as my student years approach their end, I am starting to panic. I do not have a strong inner foundation that gives me the courage to face the uncertainty ahead calmly. I know this question may have no answer, but have asked it anyway, perhaps inappropriately. Sorry!

My second subject is career planning. AI has developed so quickly over the past two years, with new technologies and products arriving one after another. I am now full of anxiety about backend development, worried that the next tipping point will destroy my own prospects. How can I keep earning a living in this era? 🥣 The view from a mountaintop differs from the view at its foot. I know my present abilities and perspective are not enough to see through this fog, and hope you can point me in a direction.

My thoughts are scattered and the logic confused. Please forgive me!

〔Shutong〕